Friday, 24 October 2008
I recently bought a nail brush.
I was impressed that the packet included usage instructions. I have lead a broadly experiential life and it has made me fairly intuitive with the working of things like a nail brush but I will concede that there may be people out there who need such guidance.
What really worried me though was the terrible slur that the brush cast on my character, broad life experiences not withstanding. I use a nail brush because I have dirty nails, usually from toiling away in the vegetable garden. This is good, clean, honest dirt.
The packet says the brush is for removing dirt and scum from under my nails.
I really must protest. Like fathers and Santa Claus, like Batman and Bruce Wayne, like Brian Burke and Kevin Rudd, scum and I are never seen together. How would I feel if some impertinent little check out girl was to say “Oh, a nail brush! Got scum under your nails then, have you?” Horrified, that’s how.
Please, bring out a scum brush if you must but leave the nail brush to the filthy but manly realms of dirt.