Poetry in the loo can cut down on paper use too, says a Japanese group campaigning to save toilet paper as part of the country's battle against global warming.
Simply pasting a "toilet poem" at the eye level of a person seated in the cubicle can help cut toilet paper use by up to 20 per cent, a study by the research centre Japan Toilet Labo showed.
"That paper will meet you only for a moment," reads one poem.
"Fold the paper over and over and over again," says another.
Or just: "Love the toilet".
Now the group is looking to have its posters displayed in 1,000 public toilets.
Perhaps J Cosmo could come up with an offering?