A selection of holiday reading.
FOOD:
Pernicious Pork; or, Astounding Revelations of the Evil Effects of Eating Swine Flesh; 1903
Oral Sadism and the Vegetarian Personality, by Glenn C. Ellenbogen (Editor); 1985;
How to Cook Roadkill: Gourmet Cooking; 1987
Be Bold With Bananas, by the Australian Banana Growers Council; 1972
Fashion is Spinach; 1938
Ancient Starch Research, by Robin Torrence & Huw J. Barton; 2005
Our Lady of the Potatoes, by Duncan Sprott; 1995
Cheese Problems Solved, by P. McSweeney (ed.); 2007 (CRC)
Life and Laughter 'midst the Cannibals; 1926
Lightweight Sandwich Construction, by J. M. Davies (Editor); 2001 (Blackwell Science)
Tea Bag Folding; 2001 (Search Press)
The Book of Marmalade: Its Antecedents, History and Role in the World Today, by C. Anne Wilson; 1983;
HEALTH ISSUES:
The Benefits of Farting Explained; 1727
Living With Crazy Buttocks, by Kaz Cooke; 2001;
Old Age: Its Cause and Prevention; 1912
Scurvy Past and Present, by Alfred Hess; 1982
It's a Gas! A Study of Flatulence, by Eric S. Rabkin, Eugene M. Silverman; 1991
Simply Bursting: A Guide to Bladder Control; 1998
The Golden Fountain: Complete Guide to Urine Therapy, by Coen van der Kroon; 1996 (Amethyst Books)
The Encyclopedia of Medical Ignorance; 1984
Is It Hot In Here or Is It Me?: Mastering the Maze of Menopause by Lorraine D'Abate, Nancy Kenyon; 2000
Nasal Maintenance: Nursing Your Nose Through Troubled Times by William Alan Stuart; 1983
The Do-It-Yourself Lobotomy: Open Your Mind to Greater Creative Thinking, by Tom Mopnahan; 2002 (Wiley)
HOW-TO BOOKS:
Teach Yourself Alcoholism; 1975
How To Become a Schizophrenic, by John Modrow; 1992
(co-packed with) What To Say When You Talk To Yourself, by Shad Helmstetter; 1982 (Grindle Press)
How to Sh*t in the Woods: An Environmentally Sound Approach to a Lost Art, by Kathleen Meyer; 1988; *Diagram Prize Winner!
How To Avoid Huge Ships, by John W. Trimmer; 1992;
How To Write a How To Write Book; 2007
How To Abandon Ship; 1942
How To Do It; or, Directions for Knowing or Doing Everything Needful; 1864
How to Abandon Ship? Hmmm. Good to know if only in a figurative sense.
ReplyDeleteHilarious reading list! Thanks for completing the terrible gaps in my knowledge...
ReplyDeleteI thought pernicious pork was rape...
ReplyDeleteNow that I see what your reading list is, everything about you becomes so much clearer. ;)
ReplyDeleteI like blueviolet's comment - made me laugh out loud. Mum gave me a strange sidelong glance, I had to pretend I was sneazing. By the way, "How to Shit in the Woods...." not a lost art at all, I'm an expert:)
ReplyDeleteUh-oh I have to agree with blueviolet.. Man, you really read those things?
ReplyDeleteLOL! Funny, i actually came across "How to cook roadkill", in a bookstore here. It was so revolting i couldn't put it down! Every time i go in there, i always check to see if its still there!
ReplyDeleteI am thinking that you are being joking with us and that these are being the books in your mind.
ReplyDeleteBlueviolet: (stern look)
ReplyDeleteHenry, Hliza: Don't encourage her.
Princess: Read Michelle's comment and then check out Amazon!
eewwhh..
ReplyDeleteOh boy , I am boring - I am reading "Cesar's Way. - the natural, everyday guide to understanding and correcting common dog problems" by Cesar Millan.
ReplyDeleteYou would love it Lee - I am working on my " Calm assertive " manner and I am trying to be the Pack Leader! Rosie and Oscar are not happy at the moment but that will shift ! LOL
My goodness, there are so many books!
ReplyDeleteNo wonder you have intelligent looks!
Well, don't strain your eyes
Read gently of the lives,
And for good eating, don't neglect recipe cookbooks.
For example the Joy of Cooking, has some
Great recipes for cooking with rum.
And, Lee, that's not all,
yes, you'll have a ball!
To discover they've also a recipe for possum!
(mmmmm. Yum!)