Friday, 19 December 2008

Einstein was not the only one with theories!


How about these for winning theories!

A contest was held for people to submit their theories on ANY subject. Here are the winners:

4th RUNNER-UP (Subject: Probability Theory)--If an infinite number of yobboes riding in an infinite number of four wheel drives fire an infinite number of shotgun rounds at an infinite number of highway signs, they will eventually produce all the world's great literary works in Braille.

3rd RUNNER-UP (Subject: Bio- Mechanics)--Why Yawning Is Contagious: You yawn to equalize the pressure on your eardrums. This pressure change outside your eardrums unbalances other people's ear pressures, so they then yawn to even it out.

2nd RUNNER-UP (Subject: Symbolic Logic)-- Communist China is technologically underdeveloped because they have no alphabet and therefore cannot use acronyms to communicate technical ideas at a faster rate.

1st RUNNER-UP (Subject: Newtonian Mechanics)--The earth may spin faster on its axis due to deforestation. Just as a figure skater's rate of spin increases when the arms are brought in close to the body, the cutting of tall trees may cause our planet to spin dangerously fast.

HONORABLE MENTION (Subject: Linguistics)-- The quantity of consonants in the English language is constant. If omitted in one place, they turn up in another. When a Bostonian "pahks his cah," the lost R's migrate southwest, causing a Texan to "warsh" his car and invest in "erl" wells.

GRAND PRIZE WINNER (Subject: Perpetual Motion)--When a cat is dropped, it always lands on its feet, and when toast is dropped, it always lands buttered side down. It was proposed to strap giant slabs of hot buttered toast, butter-side-up, to the back of a hundred tethered cats; the two opposing forces will cause the cats to hover, spinning inches above the ground. Using the giant buttered toast/cat array, a high-speed monorail could easily link New York with Chicago.


  1. Lee, I tried to post before but something happened so I started again - you may end up with 2 from me. I was asking where do you get these gems from? They're priceless. My favourites are the 1st Runner Up and, of course, the Grand Prize. I love the idea of cats having toast strapped to their backs - bring it on:)

  2. i belive that:
    "honourable mention" should become our president.
    4th runner up the vice president
    and the grand prize winner can be secretary of state if he/she is so inclined.

  3. New York to Chicago?
    With power like that, the very first bridge from San Francisco to Hawaii, then from there to Sydney could be built, single rail style, and then I can visit Australia!

    YAY for cats and buttered toast!
    Hip Hip HUZZAH!

  4. They are all very interesting theories...thinking outside the square...lateral thinking. ♥

  5. These are the kinds of theories that make sense to me. That other crap we studied in school is garbage.

  6. Maybe I can win any of those prize if I learn the scientific jargons (@nonsense) deep enough.. Now, is any of these finding useful for our life? Don't think so.

  7. Albert Einstein said "Great spirits have always encountered violent opposition from mediocre minds"

    I think he would love the whole lot. LOL

  8. Is this being the face of a man who is being considered to be being a thinker of great things? I am not thinking so.

  9. The "Perpetual Motion" winner had me laughing aloud - great stuff!


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